They Turned Us Into Killers

They Turned Us Into Killers is a total mess of a film. Its stars Scout Taylor-Compton, Taryn Manning and Lauren Francesca. The films says it says Kane Hodder and Michael Berryman. Kane Hodder is not in the film despite being third billed. The film uses footage from another film called Room 9 which this is a sequel to. Michael Berryman is not in the film at all. There is a picture of him and thats it. The film is about a young woman played by Scout Taylor-Compton who is getting revenge on a few guys who she blames for the death of her best friend. Its a really boring film thats a real chore to sit through. Bummer because I thought this was actually going to be good. Its one of the my least favorite films of the year so far.

Truth told, Scout Taylor-Compton is one of my guilty pleasures. Her acting is mediocre at best and cringeworthy enough to throw-out your neck at worst. I adore her anti-Hollywood aesthetic and white-trash tattoos and unashamedly watch anything she is in. With They Turned Us Into Killers I finally had my Scout Taylor-Compton limits pushed, however. This is by far Scout's absolute lowest point and makes her leaked sex tape look Oscar worthy. They Turned Us Into Killers is the sequel to Room 9: a film that at the time of this writing has a solid 2.0 IMDB rating. They Turned Us Into Killers isn't so much an actual sequel as a retread of Room 9, only with worse acting and pacing. They Turned Us Into Killers is mostly filler, flashbacks and unused footage from Room 9 and plods along so slowly it will work your last nerve. The dialogue and exposition are so redundant I thought the same scenes were repeating or that my file was corrupted. I'm convinced there was no script and 99.9% of this movie was improvised and all first takes used. In a time when there is free video editing software to tweak your movie into a somewhat watchable film, They Turned Us Into Killers manages to look bad, has terrible lighting, editing, "acting", scenery, and a three-minute plot dragged to feature-length. In fact, the same barn interior seems to play a few different locations without ever once being dressed differently. Taryn Manning must've owed someone a lot of money to appear in this cinematic masterpiece because she delivers her lines like she had no direction, no notes, no motivation, had no idea where she was and had never acted before. And my dirty little secret Scout, well, she's just Scout and does what Scout does in horror movies: screams, runs around, rolls her eyes and overacts. The rest of the cast must have been picked up at the local Walmart at 3AM and worked for cheese sandwiches. At 1 hour and 26 minutes I felt like I was watching a really bad three-hour epic and kept checking the runtime hoping this movie was almost over. After 5 separate attempts to finish this film I had to turn it off to preserve my sanity and moved it to the recycle bin. Right now They Turned Us Into Killers has a generous 3.7 IMDB rating, but with more viewings I'm certain it will dip below Room 9's envious 2.0 rating. Skip it and work on your Origami instead.

Remember when Scout Taylor-Compton had a career? I mean a REAL career, when she was landing decent roles in theatrical films, not in cut rate, bottom of the barrel garbage like this. Maybe she needs a new agent, maybe she made the wrong people mad...who knows. Anyway, this alleged film is absolutely laughably bad. From the horrible acting, the nonexistent production values, and that stupid song - "they turned us into killers/we're the Millers. Seriously, grownups sing that, more than once. I watch a lot of low budget movies. I find some gems, I find a lot of trash. This one is decidedly in the trash category. Nothing to see here, move along.

This is a relatively low budget horror flick. If you're looking for crazy special effects or big explosions, look elsewhere. What you get here is raw emotion, suspense, and some good kill scenes. There's plenty of blood - don't worry! The acting is generally quite good, with standout performances from Scout Taylor-Compton and Tony Devon (RIP). The timeline jumps around a bit, but it's easy to follow. The characters are believable and easy to root for/against. The set locations are simple - their rawness matches the feel of the film. This is NOT a "whodunit." You know who is doing it and find out pretty early on why. Then it's just a matter of finding out how the bad guys meet their end...and enjoying the payoff. For a relatively low budget film, the sound and camera quality is exceptionally good - on par with standard theatrical releases - and the direction is top notch. Fans of horror - especially revenge horror - won't be disappointed.